Hugh Harker, that promising young thespian, met a tragic end last week. Something involving a squirt gun filled with cognac, I believe. He’d been about to fulfill his lifelong dream of starring in the titular role of Broadway’s newest musical, Don Juan.
It was his last wish that the show go on. We, his dearest friends, promised to make it happen.
No one wanted to star alongside a cadaver, though. No problemo! We cast puppets in all the roles, slapped some strings on Hugh, and no one knew the difference. The critics raved, and now it’s sold out through March.
Did you catch all those Futurama references? This is what would happen if you made friends with Bender. It’s all squirt guns and cognac until someone ends up in a saucy puppet show.
Today’s story is about fulfilling all your dreams, one way or another. Remember the story of the Monkey’s Paw? Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it, but not in the way that you expect. Maybe you just wanted to star on Broadway, but your friends took it to the next level and made sure you got your wish even in death.
Hopefully that’s not too grim for a Monday morning!
Anyway, Homer Simpson really knew how to do the Monkey’s Paw thing. Be specific, folks, and keep your wishes sandwich-related, and you’re probably in the clear.
This story goes out to a dear friend of mine as his belated birthday present. May you enjoy many more years of cognac-filled water guns. And don’t worry: this present doesn’t come with any strings attached! *rimshot*