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Medical Microfiction: Necrogenous

“Zombie Appleseed”

A bird must’ve crapped that appleseed onto the moist, organic matter of his rotting brain. It took root, nurtured by the sun and the putrid decaying tissue of Johnny’s body. Soon it blossomed into a fine apple tree. You couldn’t tell where the tree ended and Johnny began!

He shambled westward, scattering apples behind him. When he reached Boise, we whooped and broke out the cider press. Time to get drunk again!

Usually we brained zombies, but Johnny produced the finest cider ever made by a human mind. So we set him free.

Anyway, sorry about the outbreak in Sacramento.


English: Drawing of Jonathan Chapman, aka John...
English: Drawing of Jonathan Chapman, aka Johnny Appleseed. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“Necrogenous” means originating in dead or decaying matter. In a medical sense, this is nothing but bad news. But in a literary sense, the idea might have a seed of hope in it (pun intended).

This time of year puts gardens on my mind. I’ve got a container garden on my back porch, and with Georgia being so temperate, there are already tomatoes forming on the vines. In the case of a zombie apocalypse, there’ll be a lot of mobile dead matter out and about. And what likes dead matter? A garden! All it would take would be a well-timed bird poop, and bam! Meals on Wheels! Don’t you think a human skull would make a great planter, with all the little drainage holes? …not that I know from experience or anything.

Remember, folks, always brain your zombies.

What’s your favorite cider? Would you ever try produce grown in a zombie’s brain?